


Those Things

by LokiismyfavouriteAvenger



Series: Tom and Liv [5]
Category: British actor - Fandom, Hiddles - Fandom, Professor Hiddleston - Fandom, RPF - Fandom, RPF AU - Fandom, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: AU, Angst, Awkwardness, Ben and Jerrys, Confessions, F/M, Feels, Fighting, Fluff, Hiddles AU, Häagen Dazs, Ice Cream, Idiots in Love, Insecurities, Light Angst, Love, New Relationship, RPF AU, Reconciliation, Reconciliation Sex, SO MUCH FLUFF, drama queen, professor!tom, relationship, teddy bear hiddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:54:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26992471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LokiismyfavouriteAvenger/pseuds/LokiismyfavouriteAvenger
Summary: Liv can't forget something Tom's ex said. She is being rather dramatic about it and her and Tom fight for the first time. Some surprising things are being said.
Relationships: Professor!Tom/OFC, ProfessorHiddleston/OFC, Tom Hiddleston/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Tom and Liv [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1697257
Comments: 10
Kudos: 30





	Those Things

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go again! I hope you guys still like these oneshot, cause I have no intention of stopping them!! As a matter of fact, I'm already working on the next one.
> 
> Don't worry. There isn't too much angst here. I would never do that to these two!!
> 
> Please let me know what you think! 
> 
> Many thanks @we_dreamerz for beta-ing!

“Hi Liv, what’s up?”

Liv choked on a sob as Gary's cheerful voice came through her phone.

“Liv? Oh God, Liv! What happened? Are you alright?” Gary asked quickly.

“I fucked it up, Gary. I fucked it up. With Tom. I think it’s over,” she cried into the phone.

“Holy shit Liv, what did you do?! Ok, you know what, don’t tell me. I’m on my way. I’m at your place in twenty. Just stay put. And don’t you dare do anything stupid in the meantime!” Gary exclaimed before hanging up the phone.

Liv sunk back into the cushions of her sofa and let go of the emotions she'd been holding onto.

~~~~~

Things had started to go sideways the day after the party. They'd returned to Tom's house at half past five in the morning. Tom had taken Bobby on a walk and when he returned found Liv fast asleep in his bed. He'd teased her about it as they were sitting and having… a very late breakfast? Lunch? Brunch? Well, they were eating, some eggs, toast, beans and bacon.

Both Tom and Liv had to admit that they weren’t as fit as they’d been a few years ago and a night of partying had left them exhausted, even though they’d slept for six hours.

They spent a lazy day together, Liv planning on returning to her flat in the evening but staying at Tom’s for the day. They were both reading on the sofa, Liv with her legs on a cushion on the couch table, Tom with his head comfortable in her lap, his tall frame stretched out on the sofa. Bobby was lying on Tom’s feet, gnawing on some toy and occasionally playfully nudging Tom’s toes.

Despite the peaceful scene, Liv was restless. There was something at the back of her mind, bothering her greatly. She knew it was stupid and she should drop it, but she couldn’t.

It was something Tom’s ex Joan had said the evening before when she’d confronted Tom and asked him to come back to her.

_“Remember how we used to fuck? The things I let you do to me and I did to you?”_

What the hell had she meant by that? Well. Just one way to find out.

“Tom?” Liv asked, shutting her book and looking down at the man lying in her lap.

He smiled up at her, carefully placing a bookmark inside his own book.

“Liv?” he responded playfully.

Liv sighed. If she didn’t ask what she intended to, they could very well have a passionate session of lovemaking starting in a few minutes. But she couldn’t help it. She had to ask.

“I… I have a question. One you might not want to hear,” she said hesitantly.

Tom’s facial expression changed. The smile vanished and he sat up, alert. Oh God, what did he expect now?!

“Not… nothing _bad_. No need to look so worried,” Liv tried, nervously picking at her fingers.

“Liv, you can ask me anything, you know that” he said, now clearly worried.

Liv cleared her throat.

“Uhm… Joan. What did she mean?” she tried.

Tom looked at her questioningly, clearly not understanding.

“I beg your pardon?”

“When she… she said something about what you did in bed. That you… did things to her and she did things to you. What did she mean? What things were those?” Liv asked, mentally slapping herself for being so not eloquent.

Tom looked at her for a long moment. Then, he shook his head.

“Darling, I… what Joan said, what happened back then was between her and me. I’m sorry to say this, but I don’t think I should talk to you about this.”

It felt like a slap to Liv.

“What? You don’t want to tell me?”

“No. I don’t. What we did or didn’t do is between us. It shouldn’t concern you,” Tom replied firmly.

Liv got up to pace the room, then returned to stand in front of Tom. She was already feeling desperate and weirdly aggressive.

“Tom you… you should know me a bit by now. This… this has been bugging me since she said it, honestly. I… I can’t get it out of my head. I keep… wondering. Wondering what she meant. What you did. I keep… seeing her and her gigantic tits doing… _things_ to you. Things that… well, I don’t know,” she knew she was rambling, but at the same time, she was in the grips of a panic attack.

“Wait, wait, wait. Why does it bother you what I did with an ex? Isn’t it more important what _we_ do together? I don’t want to break Joan’s trust. I think what happens in the bedroom – or anywhere else – between two people is just between them. And therefore, I won’t tell you what we did,” Tom tried.

He’d gotten up too, trying to calm Liv down. When he placed his hands on her upper arms to sooth her, she turned away, not wanting his touch.

“You do realize that no matter what we do, I’ll from now on always ask myself if _this_ is the activity she meant. I can’t help it,” she explained.

She turned around with flourish, facing Tom. Her heart was racing, and she was very upset, but she didn’t see a way out of this.

A small part of her knew she was overreacting, but she ignored it.

“So, you’re saying you won’t be telling me what she meant,” she stated, and he nodded and mumbled affirmatively.

“And I’m saying that I can’t be at peace as long as I don’t know what she meant. Fine. That’s… that sucks. Because to be honest, I don’t see how this is gonna work then,” she said, fighting to hold back tears.

She stormed past a dazed looking Tom and hurried towards the door, grabbing her already packed weekend bag on the way. She heard Tom calling out for her, but she ignored him, slamming the door shut behind her.

_Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry._

She tried to tell herself to stay calm. She’d have enough time to break down once she reached her flat. She was so focused on herself that she only heard the footsteps when it was already too late. A hand on her upper arm grabbed her, forcing her to turn around.

“Wait, Goddammit! Come on, let’s go back and talk about it. Liv, please. You can’t be serious with this!” Tom said in an angry whisper.

“Don’t! Leave me be. I said what I had to say. If you don’t tell me, then I don’t see where this is supposed to be going. Now, let go of me!” she growled at him.

Tom was looking at her as if she’d slapped him. He let go of her arm. Liv turned around and stormed away as quickly as she could.

She managed to hold it together until she was sitting on the Tube. She’d always hated it when people had these breakdowns in public, but now she was one of them. Tears were streaming down her face, earning her concerned side glances and pointed ignorance from the people around her. Why did this bloody Tube ride take so long?! She had to change once and cursed herself for realizing too late at Old Street that she’d taken the wrong branch going via Bank instead of Charing Cross, so her journey would take even longer. When she finally reached Bank, she hurried to get to the right platform at Monument. Of course, her train was only coming in twelve minutes. She cursed the London Underground, Joan, Tom and herself.

When she finally, _finally_ arrived at home, she thought she saw Tom’s blue Jag rounding a corner driving away from her place, but it was likely just her imagination. In her flat, she threw her bag into a corner and sunk down on the floor just behind the door, crying. She sat there for what must have been twenty minutes.

She’d done it. After not quite four months of bliss, she’d fucked it up entirely.

She didn’t know what else to do, so she called Gary, who promised to come over immediately.

Several minutes later, Liv stumbled zombielike into her bedroom to change into pyjamas and curled up on the sofa, sitting there in misery. When she’d called Gary, she deliberately ignored the WhatsApp notifications, text messages, and missed calls she had from a certain person.

Gary arrived after what felt like an eternity and pulled her into a bear hug as soon as he was over the doorstep. She told him what had happened as coherent as she was able, using up a whole box of tissues in the process. The look Gary shot her wasn’t too reassuring, which caused her to accuse him of not being on her side.

“Of course, I’m on your side! I’m always on your side! But don’t you think you’re a bit harsh here? I mean… you haven’t told Tom all _you_ ’ve done with other men either, have you?” he asked.

Liv huffed, sniffing.

“There’s not much to tell,” she mumbled.

Gary raised an eyebrow.

“I beg your pardon, Miss, but that’s not true and you know it! I know you only did it back then to prove to yourself that you didn’t have feelings for Marcus, which wasn’t true, but you, darling, did have some adventures! For God’s sake, woman! You had a threesome! You’re the only person I know who really did that!”

Liv looked at her feet.

“I bet Tom did that too. I mean look at him! But he’ll never tell me because he’s so… so… full of _integrity_. So fucking nice,” Liv grumbled.

She looked at Gary, pointing an accusing finger at him.

“Thanks, now I’ll come up with all the possible depravities Tom may have indulged in before me,” she exclaimed, covering her face with her hands.

“Oh Liv, please don’t! All I’m saying is that you have your secrets too!” Gary tried.

“But I’d tell him if he asked! What the fucking fuck did she mean? Huh? What was it that was so… _outrageous_ that he can’t tell me?” she sobbed the last part.

“I don’t think it has to be outrageous. I think he doesn’t want to talk about his bedroom activities with anyone else, but the person involved. I mean I get his point,” Gary said.

Liv shot him a dark glance.

“You’re telling me I’m overreacting, right? Fine. Blame this on me. Anyways, I think it’s over. I can’t be with him if he doesn’t clarify.”

“Are you sure you’re not being a bit… too dramatic?” Gary asked softly as Liv dissolved in tears.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean: are you sure this is over? What did you say to him? What did he say? Did he say he was done with you?” Gary asked, embracing his friend.

Liv tried to remember her exact words, but she couldn’t. Her head was pounding, and her eyes were hurting from crying so much.

When the landline started to ring, she quickly pulled the cable out.

Gary tried to reason with her, but Liv was too out of it. She wouldn’t listen to what he had to say and in the end, they agreed on her taking a sleeping pill she had left over from the aftermath of a minor tooth operation and calling in sick the next day. Liv saw how Gary pocketed the drugs after she’d peeled one out of the package, but she didn’t say anything. He meant well.

He even agreed to stay with her until she was asleep. Thanks to the drug, she drifted off to sleep quickly.

~~~~~

Liv woke up feeling like a truck had run her over. At first, she panicked, thinking she was late for work, but then everything came back to her and work was the last thing to worry her. She started to cry again, managed to stop long enough to phone in sick before continuing to cry her heart out.

Gary had messaged her. He told her to keep a stiff upper lip and that he would pop by after work.

Liv didn’t feel hungry, so she nibbled on a crisp bread while trying to distract herself from her misery with a rerun of Doctor Who. However, watching Martha pine after the doctor while he was pining after Rose only served to make her cry again.

She switched to Supernatural for less danger of sad love stories.

At half past two, her doorbell rang. Had Gary left work this early for her? Maybe he extended his lunch break? She shuffled towards the buzzer to let him in without checking who it was. Well. Who else could it be?

When she saw the mop of ginger curls as he walked up the stairs, taking two steps at a time, she gulped.

“Leave,” she said weakly, becoming fully aware of the fact that she was still in her pyjamas and had forgone brushing her teeth or her hair this morning, let alone showering.

She tried to shut the door in his face, but Tom was faster. He towered over her in the doorway of her small flat, looking at her with a strange expression on his face, his eyes red-rimmed.

What?

“I need to talk to you. I won’t leave before we talked,” Tom said sternly.

Reluctantly, Liv motioned to her sofa. When she sat down in the armchair next to the sofa, Tom shook his head.

“Please, sit next to me, Liv. Please do that for me.”

His puppy eyes would have melted the hearts of the most frigid person in the world, so Liv got up with a sigh and sat down next to him on the sofa, keeping as much distance between them as possible, though that hurt. A lot.

Tom turned to her. She didn’t look at him until he took her hands in his, holding them tightly. She finally looked up.

“Liv, I… I don’t know where to start. I’m… I tried to call you. And I messaged you. You… didn’t answer, I was so worried! I didn’t sleep all night,” he said.

Well, that explained the red-rimmed eyes. He took a deep breath before he continued.

“Look, I… I thought about it all. I may have been a bit harsh yesterday. I… I still don’t feel well breaking the trust of the bedroom, but if that is what it takes to calm you down, then so be it.”

Liv looked at him in surprise. He seemed to wait for a response, so she started, stuttering a bit.

“Really? I… I know I kinda overreacted a bit, but… Tom, I keep wondering what it was you were doing with _her_ and… I can’t switch off my brain. It keeps conjuring pictures of the two of you and I’m wondering if you’re holding back with me. Like, if there’s stuff you want to do that you don’t dare doing with me for some reason. I’m sorry. That’s just the way I am, unfortunately. And I’m… I’ll get my period soon and you know I tend to be on edge for the last few days before that” she said, tears again gleaming in her eyes.

Tom sighed, deeply.

“Please don’t cry. I’ll tell you. But please, don’t tell anyone else. I’m highly uncomfortable to be telling you, though not because of what we did, but because it feels like, as I said, I’m breaking her trust. I mean, I know she’s talked about it in public, but that’s not… that’s not who I am. I only make an exception because you’re so important to me and I can’t stand for you to be mad at me or the other way round,” he said, his eyes intent on hers.

Liv swallowed hard. This was the moment of truth. Tom drew a deep breath.

“Joan had a thing… about choking,” he said.

“Choking?” Liv asked.

Of all the things she came up with, this wasn’t one of them.

“Yes. Choking. She liked it a bit… harder in bed and always wanted me to choke her. At first, I was worried to do it wrong, so I read up on it. I think I managed to do it right. It… Please believe me when I say that it doesn’t do anything for me. I’m not… I did it for her. It doesn’t turn me on particularly, it doesn’t turn me off either. She liked it, so I did it,” he explained.

Liv’s eyes were round as saucers. If she was being honest with herself, she was relieved.

“And what did she mean with _the things she did to you_?” she asked eventually.

Tom was fumbling with his fingers in his lap, seemingly concentrated on his hands. He seemed uncomfortable.

“Oh that, uhm… she… she didn’t have a gag reflex. She could, uhm… she could take me down her throat,” he said, not looking at Liv.

Her heart sunk. She _did_ have a gag reflex. Of course, it must have been very pleasurable for Tom.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

“Pardon?”

She looked up at him.

“I said I’m sorry. That I can’t do that.”

He looked at her as if she’d lost her mind.

“You don’t have to apologize! Darling! I… I mean yes, it did feel good, but… you… I… look, that thing you do with your tongue when you… Liv, please! I don’t know about you, but I’m very satisfied with our bedroom activities,” Tom said.

She could see it in his eyes that he meant it. Focusing on her feet, she felt silly.

“I’m sorry for my outburst yesterday. And thank you so much for telling me! I know it was stupid, I’m just so… I don’t want you to feel you’re lacking because you’re with me. In bed, I mean. I’m sorry that I’m so insecure,” she said, again with tears threatening to spill

Tom gently cupped her cheek in the palm of his right hand, forcing her to look at him.

“Liv, my darling, I know you won’t believe me, but you are not lacking anything. You’re a passionate, wonderful woman, who can be a bit silly sometimes, but that’s okay, because we’re all silly sometimes. And please believe me when I say that… that… Liv, I love you,” he declared earnestly.

For a few seconds, all she could do was stare at him. Nobody had ever said the three big words to her. And now Tom, lovely, wonderful, gorgeous Tom, with his red-rimmed blue eyes and the slightly dishevelled hair said them to her. While she was wearing pyjamas in the afternoon and likely smelled of cold sweat and looked miserable.

“Oh Tom!” she threw herself at him, grabbing him by the back of his neck and burying one hand in his mane.

She pulled him close and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. His lips felt so good on hers and being close to him again felt so right. Between heated kisses, she managed to pull back a moment.

“I love you too,” she whispered.

He moaned and this time, it was him who pulled her close. Somehow, Liv managed to push her pyjama pants down and Tom hurriedly unbuckled his belt and fumbled with his zipper and then they were one, Liv lifting her hips to get Tom deeper and Tom kissing, licking and biting all over her neck. When he continued to kiss below her ear and started to whisper endless ‘I love yous’, his hips setting a slow, but sensuous pace with a mean grind at the end of each thrust, Liv couldn’t help but cry out as a wave of ecstasy consumed her. Tom followed her over the edge of pleasure, and they found themselves lying there, panting hard.

Liv played with his curls as he nuzzled her neck, peppering her with soft kisses. Finally, Tom pulled back, looking at her with a loving expression.

“I meant to say if for a while, but I didn’t dare to for fear it was too early,” he said, smiling at her.

Liv smiled back, leaning up for a quick peck on his lips.

“I’m glad you said it,” she replied.

They detangled themselves and their clothes and sat up again, cuddling.

“So, I take it that you’re coming over on Wednesday after work, as usual?” Tom asked eventually.

Liv grinned.

“Absolutely!”

“Good! We could… only if you want to, but… we _could_ … talk about things we’d like to try with each other. Sex-wise, I mean,” Tom offered.

Liv sent him a sideways glance, eyes narrowed.

“Oh? Are there some dirty little fantasies you want to act out, Professor Hiddleston?” she asked.

Tom turned to her and she gulped. There was a passion in his eyes she’d barely seen before.

“Oh yes, my darling. There are a few things I’d like to try with you,” he announced before kissing her hard.

When they pulled back, they were both out of breath. Liv pressed her face into the crook of Tom’s neck, breathing him in. She couldn’t get close enough to him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t respond to your messages,” she eventually said against the skin of his neck.

“I was very worried. And I was even more worried when you weren’t here after you left my place yesterday,” he said.

She was confused.

“I was here, the whole time! Gary was with me. When… were you here?” she asked.

“I followed you to the tube, but the train must have left just a minute earlier. I went back to the house, took care of Bobby and drove over here. You wouldn’t open the door. I figured I’d wait, that maybe you weren’t there already but would arrive eventually, but the tube doesn’t take _that_ long, so I thought… you were here but wouldn’t let me in. I didn’t even want to think about an alternative,” he said, an air of despair surrounding him.

Liv had an idea what may have happened.

“When did you leave here?”

“Huh?”

“How long did you wait?”

“I don’t know. I was… maybe close to two hours after you left.”

Liv chuckled and shook her head.

“I took the wrong train and only realized it too late. I had to change at Bank and then my train took rather long to arrive. I was back more than two hours after I left yours.”

Tom groaned.

“So, we missed each other just by minutes?”

“Likely.”

Tom nuzzled her neck again and Liv hummed appreciatively.

They were interrupted when the doorbell rang. Repeatedly.

“Are you expecting someone?” Tom asked as Liv got up.

“Gary wanted to drop by after work. Uhm, Tom, could you please… open the window? It smells a bit… animalistic in here,” she said, blushing.

Tom grinned lopsidedly, nevertheless doing as she’d asked.

“Liv, how are you? Look, I brought Ben and Jerry’s and Häagen Dazs, I know how much you like it and… oh! Hi Tom!” Gary had just entered the living room, seeming surprised, relieved and amused all at the same time.

“I take it you’re not in need of Häagen Dazs anymore,” he smirked.

“No, no, no, wait a minute, which sorts did you bring?” she asked, grinning.

Gary pulled several containers of ice cream from his bag and Liv inspected them carefully.

“Liv… you do know there’s a wet spot on the front of your pants?” he asked.

Liv stared at him in horror, then down at her pajamas. He was right, there was a dark spot on the light blue material.

“Be right back,” she mumbled, hurrying to the bedroom, not missing Tom’s triumphant grin.

She overheard them talking while she hastily changed her clothes.

“I take it everything’s alright again between the two of you?” Gary asked.

“More than alright. Thank you, Gary, for caring for our Liv the way you did,” she heard Tom reply.

“Oh, never mind. What’s most important is that the two of you are on good terms again,” he was saying when she returned to the living room, dressed in yoga pants and a clean shirt.

“Guys, I didn’t want to interrupt anything, so I’ll leave. Liv, call me later, okay?” Gary said, already retreating towards the door.

“No, Gary, wait! Thank you for coming here, today as well as yesterday! Come on, let’s… let’s have some ice cream together!” Liv offered.

Minutes later, the three of them sat at her small dining table, munching away at delicious ice cream, Tom and Gary talking animatedly. Liv smiled to herself. Everything was splendid. And she couldn’t wait for Wednesday!

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts?


End file.
